EXCLUSIVE: Debina Bonnerjee felt ‘cornered and alone’ during battle with endometriosis and adenomyosis: I would ask myself ‘why me’

Debina Bonnerjee and Gurmeet Choudhary have had a big year in 2022 as the couple welcomed their first kid, daughter Liana in April and recently, on November 11, they became parents to their second daughter. While the couple is elated to have completed their dream family, the journey to reach there hasn’t been easy for the two. In the first episode of XtraOrdinary You Season 2, Debina Bonnerjee got into an exclusive conversation with Bollywood Bubble where she reflected on the tumultuous journey Gurmeet and she had to face to welcome their miracle babies.

 

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During the conversation, Debina revealed that she came to Mumbai with a dream to make it big. “And in that dream, there wasn’t any space for a family or a baby because it was still considered tabboo, until of late that all the top heroines are embracing motherhood and it is making it loud and clear and it is inspiring a lot of people that yes, you can have a baby along with having a career but just a few years back, it wasn’t the same. So, it was never in my agenda, itenary I would say.”

Debina Bonnerjee on her battle with endometriosis, adenomyosis

But after being with Gurmeet for a long time, they decided to start a family. “One and a half year went like that and we were like, it’s just not working out. I am a person who wants to be at it. If I have to do it now, I will be like let’s do it right now, I can’t procrastinate. I was like let’s not be laid back and I went to a gynaecologist. She said everything was fine and you have all the time of your life. But I felt something was a miss. Then I went to a fertility specialist and this time there was a detailed scan to find out what is the problem. That’s when I came to know of certain conditions in my body that I had never known existed. Something called endometriosis, adenomyosis,” she informed.

 

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Elaborating further on her journey of getting to know more about it, Debina shared, “I did not even know the meaning or spelling of it. I was like what does it mean because we have heard about PCOD and PCOS and there are over the counter products available for them but what is endometriosis and adenomyosis? It’s like the baap of all fertility problems and 85-90 percent of women above 30 have this condition.” She added that its is actually not an unknown problem but people just don’t speak about it. “So many women around have these conditions, and doctors consider it ‘hota hai’ because they have seen it so much and there is no treatment for it. And with that condition in your uterus, it’s very difficult to conceive, it’s almost closed to nil, it’s like if only God wishes to.”

When asked how did the news of this condition affected her, Debina insisted, “I felt like as if my body was failing me. There are so many things in life that you can do with your push and mental strength, but what is happening inside of your body, it’s just out of your control and you feel like your body is failing you. If I was driving alone, I would talk to myself and ask, why me? I have such a healthy lifestyle, why me and how come I did not know of it, how come I had not heard of it. I would have done it before, thought about it before. So, why is there no education about it.”

 

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Debina started questioning and doubting herself as well, and talking about that time, she said, “Everyday I was just looking at myself and I was living like a zombie. I was shooting, I was showing happy and was happy also. But whenever there was nobody around me, I used to only think ‘I am not capable’. And when you feel that you are not capable, obviously the society feels that way. The society is not behind and in it is everybody, your fans, relatives and friends.”

She even revealed things that people said to her and the line that troubled her the most. “‘Khushkhabri kab de rahi ho?’ I just felt that otherwise you are not happy? Does that only factor makes you happy, otherwise I, as a person, can’t make you happy. So, this kind of phrases and one-liners were very hurtful. Maybe it was out of happiness coming from somewhere but to a person who is trying and yet not happening, it is very hurtful. I used to get so sensitive because my treatment was going on, I was going through my IVF cycles and since it is the ingestion of a lot of hormones inside the body, I was putting on a little weight. Maybe I had worn a tighter outfit in which a little belly was showing, so they wrote, ‘is she pregnant’, with an added bump, I saw in one video. And I couldn’t understand how to react to it. People would see me in the hospital and then tell others that she is expecting, she is hiding. How do I tell that I am not and I am trying. Right now, it is not the time to ask. So, I would feel very cornered, devastated and as you feel, in my space, I was just alone,” she asserted.

 

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Today, all those hardships seem to have had a happy end, as Debina Bonnerjee and Gurmeet Choudhary are proud parents to two baby girls, and here’s wishing this happy little family all the love, good health and happiness.

Check out the entire conversation with Debina here:

Also Read: EXCLUSIVE: Debina Bonnerjee BREAKS DOWN in tears as she recalls ‘devastating’ failed IVF attempts